Why "Kill It With Fire" Is a Terrible, Terrible Idea

Whenever I post something with a photo of a spider, I can reliably predict that the first or second comment will be “OMG Kill it with Fire!!11!!"

It's happening more and more often, and it's not my imagination. When you look at trends in use of the phrase, it seemed to become common in 2007, and has been slowly creeping up since then. About the only event in 2007 that I can plausibly relate to "Kill it with Fire!" is the release of Microsoft Windows Vista.

In general, attempts by members of the general public to kill things with fire (spiders or insects) end in disaster. Here are just a few examples:

Exploding Toilets:

"IT engineer...chased the spider into their bathroom in Clacton, Essex. Wielding a flammable aerosol can, he sprayed the spider as it cowered behind the toilet pan - then lit a cigarette lighter to see if he had killed it. However, the flame ignited the gas and caused a massive explosion which blew the man off his feet and lifted the loft door off its hinges, causing severe burns."

Exploding Buildings:

If you put out 24 bug bombs, and they don't work, the solution is not to put out more bug bombs. Especially if you have a pilot light. There is a REASON they are called "bombs".

Burning Down Your House:

A California man accidentally set his house on fire while using a blowtorch to clear spider webs out of his backyard. But really, who could have predicted that outcome?

Burning Down Someone Else's House:

If your plan to eliminate bed bugs in your couch is to douse it with alcohol, you should probably not smoke a cigarette while you do that. 30 left homeless after fire.

You also should not "help" your neighbors by trying to torch a wasp nest on their house while they are on vacation.

Is Cleansing Fire Ever Justified?

There actually are a few legit ways to use heat and fire for pest control. One valid way of getting rid of bed bugs is to heat your home up; but that needs to be done by a licensed professional. When people try to DIY a heat treatment, it almost always ends the same way:

"A man trying to get rid of bedbugs from his Woodbury home accidentally set it on fire Tuesday, injuring himself and a firefighter....The homeowner had apparently been trying to eradicate the bedbugs from his house using a home remedy that included a space heater, hair dryer, and heat gun to "heat" the bugs out."

The only legitimate use of fire for control that I know of is using fire for weed control in agriculture. It’s usually given the quite awesome name of “Flaming for Pest Control.” Here is an example:

This is why agriculture is so awesome, BTW. There just aren’t that many professions where you get to drive a giant flamethrower. Flaming is generally used in organic systems, which is a bit puzzling, since it uses propane, diesel, and produces lots of greenhouse gases.

So, not exactly sustainable, but I can see the appeal. Because FIRE.